Alternate title: I may or may not be stoned right now.
Yeah, you guessed right. The glory and the doom walking hand in hand. The thing is? I can't feel it if I'm not stoned. Not this way. Not looking past everything and seeing... which brings me to my second point. I can't think or reason about it when I am stoned.
But let's give it a whirl! (I think the real reason I like writing this stuff down to myself is that I know when I'm reading it tomorrow I'll be busting a gut. Or at the very least thinking 'what a weirdo' or some variation of that word.)
My foster-sister, Lacey's grandfather passed away today. I feel that stuff to the core now. It hits me in a way it never had before. A woman I work with says it's because I'm still grieving Dad but, while I agree that may be true, I know I'd be feeling it anyway. I said to Mom that I wish I didn't know how this feels. But that's not completely true.
I have more patience now. I have opinions and I I feel more. Not just deeper but more. Not just more frequently but for more people, in more ways. Funnily enough, I also need it less. Pot. Emotional breakdowns.
Whatev, Kev.
